Living together for almost three years is a good amount of journey in your life. For me atleast like, part of me feels like time is absolutely flying and the other half feels like we have been married for three years. We have certainly not been perfect, but I'm gonna share fews lessons which I learnt out of these three years which I spent in my relationship.
1. Importance of a quick vacation
We made a big list of places to travel and see.. Actually travel is one thing which we both agree on and do.. Sometimes even if it's a one day trip in and around the city, it will take us back to the level up phase.. We always come back, feeling more connected.
2. Your flexibility & vulnerability
- Once you start living with a person, you will feel flexible by sharing your routine work.. I mean, how good does it feel if your routine work is done by your partner? (other than your Mom of course).
- And, You be able to tell your partner something like "I really feel... xyz...", Where xyz is completely open and without any hidden agenda. This will be the hardest thing initially, but you are vulnerable with your partner means you are doing great in your relationship.
3. Always Negotiation
You will learn What is Negotiation? (if you had not done it earlier). For everything you do along with your partner you start negotiating. Sometimes you win, and sometimes you let your partner win - But you will enjoy it.
4. Don't Debate right before going to Bed
This is one of the worst things, I recommend not to do. Why? Sometimes, You might have already done for the day & your brain will not be in a position to listen (A tired Brain). Instead, I suggest having a word and discussing later in the day.
5. Relationship is always a WIP (Work In Progress)
You will always be having a challenge in your relationship like, initially managing work at home, mingling with people.. later travelling, buying a home etc.. There's no endpoint. You have to treat your relationship like a learning experience, where perfection is not the goal.
6. Keep learning new ways, to keep things romantic
Yeah, you should keep learning! I mean, Initially you might be getting flowers as a romantic gesture.. After sometime your partner herself gets flowers.. You know what i mean, Even if you get flowers now, you both might be missing that romantic gesture which you had earlier.. So it's better to start doing new things like Cooking dinner or something as a romantic gesture..
Finally, When you're single, you get used to being selfish because there's only you.
In a relationship it's about more than your own selfish desires. A relationship means you live together and make time for each other.